When you think of Spring you think of re-birth. I am sitting on my screened in porch looking at all the gorgeous buds and blooms. I can smell the fragrance of re-birth. In the past few week we have not only seen the re-birth of the trees but we have watched the re-birth of Gracie. Odd thing to say you think. No not at all. I will try to explain and hope it makes sense.
Many of you out there know that Gracie has always had a bit of separation anxiety. It has been since she was very tiny. She was always my cling-on and did not do well going to a nursery while I went to bible study or church. Honestly by the time she was old enough for preschool I was so burned out and yet at the same time concerned about sending her to preschool. She had wonderful loving teachers who were very patient. We had tons of hurdles that first year.
One of those hurdles was when spring started. Allergies nailed her like a ton of brick. She literally looked like she was crying all of the time. Her little eyes were running, red and raw from rubbing because they itched her so. Her nose was runny and stuffed at the same time. She has always had allergies but we were always able to treat them with Claritin or Zyrtec for kids. That year nothing was helping. We took her to the doctor who first prescribed an eye drop. We soon discovered how strong Gracie was. No way could we get those drops into her eyes. We went back and they prescribed a nose spray and we again encountered how strong she was. She also said it made her nose hurt. The only alternative seemed to be to try a little chewable called Singulair. She took it and was finally getting some relief! We read about the medicine and it seemed to be fine with few side effects. This was also the school year that she started sleep walking only we did not realize that was what she was doing until an entire year later. We thought she was waking and coming to bed with us.
Her second year of preschool seemed to go better. It was helpful that her teachers were also her Sunday school teachers. During that school year we realized that she had anxiety about other things too. You could not tell her about anything you were going to do until you were ready to go do it or she would start getting anxious about it. This was especially true if Ron had to go on a trip for work or if I was going to go out and leave her a home with daddy or if we were planning on going on a date. Gracie did not like to be in a room by herself. She could not watch or be read anything with that had the slightest hit of suspense or a mean person. She was having bad dreams and would fight with things in her sleep, I knew that because she would hit and kick me in her sleep. This was also about the time when we figured out that she was sleep walking. My grandmother did it so we did not think too much of it.
Kindergarten! She was excited but those first weeks went so much better than either Ron or I expected. It was such a blessing. That blessing was short lived. She rode the bus for the first 2 months or so but then she would fight us about getting on the bus. So I started driving her to school and picking her up. It gave her an extra 30 minutes with me in the morning and the afternoon. I had been the Kindergarten lunch helper on Monday mornings the whole school year. Just before Christmas she started getting upset and clinging to me when it was time for me to leave. That behavior continued after the Christmas break. Then things started really escalating. She was not getting ready for school in the morning telling us she wasn't going. She would throw fits over something we had said many times before. Some of the fits were destructive and she was hitting us and running away from us.
One time when Ron was gone on a trip and she was having a bad morning. I said I would walk her in. When we got to the class her teacher was not there but an assistant teacher was there. She said the teacher would be there in a little bit. Gracie freaked out and ran from the room. The custodian kept her from running out the front door but I chased her all the way through the school to the back door. I caught her but it took 15 minutes to get her calmed down before I even tried to get her to her room. I was drained by the time I got her to her room and got her to stay. The next week my parents were here and they got to see her meltdown in the middle of Logan's as we waited for a table. She took off out the door and Ron had to chase her and then she was kicking and screaming. We had to leave. The school meltdown happened another time 2 weeks later. The weekend after it happened the second time she had another fit. We told her she could not have a drink at Sheetz and she literally laid down in the middle of the floor kicking and screaming. Ron had to pick her up under his arm and carry her out. She threw her shoes. I had to drop Ron back at work and go pick up Naomi from a party. While I was standing at the door getting Naomi Gracie was in the car stripping off her clothes and throwing them and then hid in the back of the minivan. When we got home she ran into the house naked and moved her dresser out from the wall and ripped the cord to her light out of the wall. It was almost 2 hours of crazy behavior.
Many of you out there know that Gracie has always had a bit of separation anxiety. It has been since she was very tiny. She was always my cling-on and did not do well going to a nursery while I went to bible study or church. Honestly by the time she was old enough for preschool I was so burned out and yet at the same time concerned about sending her to preschool. She had wonderful loving teachers who were very patient. We had tons of hurdles that first year.
One of those hurdles was when spring started. Allergies nailed her like a ton of brick. She literally looked like she was crying all of the time. Her little eyes were running, red and raw from rubbing because they itched her so. Her nose was runny and stuffed at the same time. She has always had allergies but we were always able to treat them with Claritin or Zyrtec for kids. That year nothing was helping. We took her to the doctor who first prescribed an eye drop. We soon discovered how strong Gracie was. No way could we get those drops into her eyes. We went back and they prescribed a nose spray and we again encountered how strong she was. She also said it made her nose hurt. The only alternative seemed to be to try a little chewable called Singulair. She took it and was finally getting some relief! We read about the medicine and it seemed to be fine with few side effects. This was also the school year that she started sleep walking only we did not realize that was what she was doing until an entire year later. We thought she was waking and coming to bed with us.
Her second year of preschool seemed to go better. It was helpful that her teachers were also her Sunday school teachers. During that school year we realized that she had anxiety about other things too. You could not tell her about anything you were going to do until you were ready to go do it or she would start getting anxious about it. This was especially true if Ron had to go on a trip for work or if I was going to go out and leave her a home with daddy or if we were planning on going on a date. Gracie did not like to be in a room by herself. She could not watch or be read anything with that had the slightest hit of suspense or a mean person. She was having bad dreams and would fight with things in her sleep, I knew that because she would hit and kick me in her sleep. This was also about the time when we figured out that she was sleep walking. My grandmother did it so we did not think too much of it.
Kindergarten! She was excited but those first weeks went so much better than either Ron or I expected. It was such a blessing. That blessing was short lived. She rode the bus for the first 2 months or so but then she would fight us about getting on the bus. So I started driving her to school and picking her up. It gave her an extra 30 minutes with me in the morning and the afternoon. I had been the Kindergarten lunch helper on Monday mornings the whole school year. Just before Christmas she started getting upset and clinging to me when it was time for me to leave. That behavior continued after the Christmas break. Then things started really escalating. She was not getting ready for school in the morning telling us she wasn't going. She would throw fits over something we had said many times before. Some of the fits were destructive and she was hitting us and running away from us.
One time when Ron was gone on a trip and she was having a bad morning. I said I would walk her in. When we got to the class her teacher was not there but an assistant teacher was there. She said the teacher would be there in a little bit. Gracie freaked out and ran from the room. The custodian kept her from running out the front door but I chased her all the way through the school to the back door. I caught her but it took 15 minutes to get her calmed down before I even tried to get her to her room. I was drained by the time I got her to her room and got her to stay. The next week my parents were here and they got to see her meltdown in the middle of Logan's as we waited for a table. She took off out the door and Ron had to chase her and then she was kicking and screaming. We had to leave. The school meltdown happened another time 2 weeks later. The weekend after it happened the second time she had another fit. We told her she could not have a drink at Sheetz and she literally laid down in the middle of the floor kicking and screaming. Ron had to pick her up under his arm and carry her out. She threw her shoes. I had to drop Ron back at work and go pick up Naomi from a party. While I was standing at the door getting Naomi Gracie was in the car stripping off her clothes and throwing them and then hid in the back of the minivan. When we got home she ran into the house naked and moved her dresser out from the wall and ripped the cord to her light out of the wall. It was almost 2 hours of crazy behavior.
I have told people in the past that Gracie had a fit or is having a bad day and they just tell me they can't imagine it because she is so sweet. I was so glad for my parents to see her have a small one while they were here. I felt like finally someone would be believe me. The last month has been so hard. Her behavior and anxiety seemed to just be getting totally out of control. I told Ron that I wanted to go see a counselor to get help because I did not know what to do with her when she has a fit. Ron had no more patience than I did with this fits and agreed to help me find someone to talk to.
God is so awesome! His timing is excellent! The night of the Sheetz fit I started looking for side effects from Singulair. I honestly have no idea why other than the Lord made me do it. I was SHOCKED!!!
Behavior and mood-related changes have been reported. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you or your child have any of these symptoms while taking SINGULAIR:
- agitation including aggressive behavior or hostility
- bad or vivid dreams
- depression
- disorientation (confusion)
- feeling anxious
- hallucination (seeing or hearing things that are not really there)
- irritability
- restlessness
- sleepwalking
- suicidal thoughts and actions (including suicide)
- tremor
- trouble sleeping
They had added new side effects in October of 2010. I did not read the paper that comes with the medicine anymore. It had been 2 years. I did not know the FDA can make new side effects be added if enough people who are taking the medicine report side effects. I found a link that took me to testimonials from parents who had kids on Singulair. The parents talked of the behavior their children had and it was liking reading about Gracie. I read stories of the time it takes to go through withdrawal and how parents were getting their old children back.
I read what I was reading to Ron and we decided to take her off of the medicine immediately. That was March 5th. It was about a week and a half of withdraw and extremely rough days. It has really been like watching the re-birth of Gracie. She had a melt down one day this past week but it was about 20 minutes instead of 2 hours and much less intense. She has always eaten like a picky little bird but in the past 2 weeks we have watched her appetite come back. She needs to eat 5 small meals and when she says she is hungry you need to feed her or she gets really cranky but that is so much easier to deal with than the crazy erratic and irrational behavior we had been seeing.
I am so thankful to the Lord for making me look that up. If we had gone to a conselor I am not sure that they would have been able to really help us. Two Sundays ago the Pastor said the "God often takes us to the brink so that we can learn to trust Him". Oh how I needed to hear that. That was one of the first days that we got a glimpse of the old Gracie coming back. He had taken Ron and I to the brink with Gracie. I was about ready to break and He gave us relief! I have learned so many lessons through this experience. The top one after trusting the Lord is to not judge people. I am sure people were judging us when Gracie would throw one of her fits when we were out in public. I now know that there can be so much more going on than what you see on the surface.
God is so good!!!!!
Yes! Unfortunately Singulair does have those side effects. That is why neither Catherine or I take it! I'm sorry you had to find out the hard way.
ReplyDeleteHeather Meyer